As a coach do you need to know all of the answers?
18 Jul 2007
To be an effective coach do you need to have the answers for your coachee?
Certainly in my experience of coaching people, many answers often spring into my mind – and I am clear about what I would do in particular situations – so why don’t I just tell the coachee what and how to do it and save us both time?
Although it may be true that I know what I would do, it doesn’t follow on that what I would do is what my coachee would or should do (there are no “you should” and “you ought to's” in a coaching conversation.)
It is their job not mine. They are responsible for their own choices, decisions and actions. They need to feel responsible, committed and confident about what they are going to do. It is their world and reality and not mine.
What might suit me and work for me might well not work for them. They may have (and often do have) completely different ideas and approaches. If I tell them my solution or action it may immediately shut off their creativity and thinking about possibilities and options.
If I don’t give them my suggestions am I denying them the opportunity of learning from my experience?
Not if I time my idea offer right and not if I say it on the right way – in a way that allows the coachee to accept it, consider or reject it of their own free will – not just because I said so.
So if I want to be that effective non-directive coach that I aspire to be I have learned to suspend my ideas and solutions and not to give my coachees my answer - but to encourage them to search for their own.
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